Do you have a hobby that outsiders find hard to understand? Some years ago the burger van from the car boot sales had a secret assignment. Since sufficient time has elapsed I feel I am no longer under threat if I reveal the mission: They were to serve food to a group of military re-enactors in Norfolk. Re-enactors are a group of much maligned people, mainly men, who dress up as soldiers and re-enact battles. Sometimes they are (rather unkindly in my opinion) called Walts (as in Walter Mitty). There seems to be many levels of involvement: from the basic re-enactor who just has a uniform (or part of), to those who have even purchased time-specific military vehicles. If my daily blog suddenly disappears, you’ll know they got me…

Raymond works in Foreign Sales,
Charles on the seventh floor,
They don’t meet, during the week,
But weekends they go to war!

This time it is Thetford,
Last time it was York,
A year ago, Salisbury in snow,
White camouflage had been bought!

Herr Raymond will be a German,
‘Chuck’ will be a Yank,
Battle of the bulge, from food indulged,
He wouldn’t fit in a tank!

Unterofficer Colin Smurfitt,
Commands his ‘Gruppen Panzer’,
His uniform should never be worn,
He looks like a pregnant panda!

Half time in the battle,
The ‘soldiers’ need supplies,
Both armies you’ll see, drinking tea,
From a burger van (in disguise)!

Saturday evening at the campfire,
Like a bunch of overgrown scouts,
The smell’s real bad from the meal they’ve had,
Beer, chicken, beans and sprouts!

Sunday morning pouring with rain,
They look very sorry too,
One night spent in an army tent,
And they’ve blocked the portable loo!

Sunday afternoon the battle won,
‘Germans’ put to the sword,
Enough geniality, back to reality,
In a ‘Staff Car’ made by Ford!
© Baldock Bard 2013
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