Monthly Archives: November 2015

The Blame Game!

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When was the last time you broke something? Was it one of those silly moments when the breakage could have been avoided? When fertiliser arrives on the farm in one-tonne bags a lack of concentration can be serious. I was careless and broke a cladding sheet in the barn while stacking the bags with the JCB Loadall. It will be difficult to replace as it is heavy, awkward and in a very inconvenient place. The worst part is that there is no one else to blame…

I’ve a new window up in the barn.
While stacking fertilizer looked up with alarm,
I had heard a very large crack,
Now daylight was seen at the back!
It’s there now for all to see,
“Yes!” you’ll all know that it was me,
In future I’ll surely know,
steady with big bags to go!
Broken CladdingIt must be great to be able to blame others, however when there is never anyone else around it is not impossible but difficult!

© Baldock Bard 2015
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E-mail: baldockbard@www.baldockbard.co.uk




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The Baldock Bombardment!

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All over this weekend in the UK the predominant night-time sound has been that of fireworks. Last night they reached such a crescendo of sounds that I’d expect were reminiscent of a war zone. I had never experienced such a bombardment…

Sounds like Letchworth,
and Baldock are at war,
Sunday night explosions,
not heard before.
The night sky lights up,
with a thousand cannon flashes,
as both sides engage,
in more fiery clashes.
I race for the car,
to film for networks,
drive over the hill,
Phew! Only fireworks!

Please take a moment from your day to think of those who hear these sounds and know they are not fireworks but the sound of war. 

© Baldock Bard 2015
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above


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E-mail: baldockbard@www.baldockbard.co.uk




The Baldock Boot Sale
SG7 6RD
is the friendliest bargain bonanza anywhere!
Back every Saturday after Easter 2016
With more FREE parking and billions of bargains!
www.u-boot.co.uk

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Nature’s Climbers!

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While splitting logs with the log-splitter the other day I noticed that I was no longer alone. I stopped work and gazed in amazement at a team of climbers who had no ropes, no hard hats and not an ounce of high-vis between them…

Health and safety doesn’t exist,
when wood-lice scale their wooden cliffs,
up they run right to the top,
not even for a breather stop!
Then there’s a crack, lo and behold:
they never miss a single foothold,
as before them a challenge new,
another climb before the day is through!
When faced with a new challenge, remember the woodlouse and power through! Have a great weekend. BB.

© Baldock Bard 2015
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above

Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: baldockbard@www.baldockbard.co.uk




The Baldock Boot Sale
SG7 6RD
is the friendliest bargain bonanza anywhere!
Back every Saturday after Easter 2016
With more FREE parking and billions of bargains!
www.u-boot.co.uk

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The ‘F’ Word!

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dressIf you have children, grandchildren or see children at any point during your day you’ll be able to recognise a ‘Frozen’ attack. It starts with just one chorus of ‘Let it Go’, possibly even sung as a joke at the bar or overheard in the office. By then, even though you don’t know it, you’re hooked. The next stage is dressing in sky blue whilst singing, howling or caterwauling ‘Let it Go!” Despite being mainly aimed at children, sometimes it even strikes down the elderly…

Woke up this morning quite disturbed,
in my head a song I’d heard,
wouldn’t shift ever hard I tried!
Round and round my brain was fried!
My Granddaughter came through the door,
I couldn’t take it any more,
as she ran to and fro,
she was screaming ‘Let it go-o!”
I knew by then I must lie down,
psychiatrist’s couch in Baldock town!
Outside the fields had no snow,
I just muttered “Let it Go!”
It’s been removed from my head,
replaced by emptiness instead.
They say release can be quite brief,
avoid it if you want relief.
I still hanker for a dress of blue!
the next afflicted could be YOU!

Why didn’t I write those lyrics? I have to admit the whole film/music/clothing thing is very cleverly aimed with a scatter-gun, affecting just about everyone! Criticism is simply jealousy!

© Baldock Bard 2015
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above

Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: baldockbard@www.baldockbard.co.uk




The Baldock Boot Sale
SG7 6RD
is the friendliest bargain bonanza anywhere!
Back every Saturday after Easter 2016
With more FREE parking and billions of bargains!
www.u-boot.co.uk

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Not Taking Terns!

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TernsUnlike in humans, where greed is deplorable, in nature it’s often a means of survival. Recently on the river, my 3-year-old granddaughter threw some stale bread for the ducks. The resultant melee would have done justice to a saloon in the Wild West…

Like diners at an ‘all you can eat buffet’,
the terns fought over our bread,
no ‘excuse me’ or ‘pardon my manners’
but fighting and squawking instead!

“Why are they fighting?” she asked me,
“They’re greedy for food,” I replied,
they reminded me of hotel guests,
queuing for their hot breakfast fried!

© Baldock Bard 2015
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above


Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: baldockbard@www.baldockbard.co.uk




The Baldock Boot Sale
SG7 6RD
is the friendliest bargain bonanza anywhere!
Back every Saturday after Easter 2016
With more FREE parking and billions of bargains!
www.u-boot.co.uk

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The Launch Invitation!

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SupercarSelling a commodity is never a precise art. Here on the farm I use a co-operative called Fengrain to sell my wheat for me as I am a grower not a seller! I guesstimate my crop in January, work out when my cash-flow needs life-saving injections and the professionals do the rest! They are able to sell through the year and I am able to relax a little. This year, in a time of rock-bottom prices not seen since the early-Eighties they have so far sold at levels beyond my wildest hopes…

My cash-flow sighed with contentment,
when the money came in from the wheat,
it wasn’t the best of the last years,
but for this year was a real treat!
We have grown used to advertising,
tailored on Facebook and Twitter,
in my case it is many drone-things,
and ways of getting much fitter!
But I wasn’t expecting the postman,
to anticipate better prices so far,
by delivering an invitation,
for the launch of a Porsche supercar!

…Thanks to Fengrain for making my wheat values so much better, but I’m sorry to disappoint you Mr Porsche, they aren’t that good!

© Baldock Bard 2015
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above


Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: baldockbard@www.baldockbard.co.uk

The Baldock Boot Sale
SG7 6RD
is the friendliest bargain bonanza anywhere!
Back every Saturday after Easter 2016
With more FREE parking and billions of bargains!
www.u-boot.co.uk

 

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