800 Not Out! | Baldock Bard

Let me set the scene: it is well after midnight and I’m watching the grain store. The moon is completely surrounded by a watery glow, there is a gentle far-away roar of the combine harvester and we’re attempting to beat the rain that is forecast for 2am by harvesting into the night. I’m listening to Si Cranstoun singing ‘Caught in the Moonlight’, a merry little number that makes me almost want to dance (unfortunately not only am I allergic to dancing but it would also constitute a gross act of criminality in Health and Safety terms). Every so often my thoughts are interrupted by the tractor and trailer that spills yet more wheat into the intake pit and I’m forced to use a brush to sweep!
I open up my trusty dusty Mac and log onto my Bard page. Holy Moley Guacamole! I had no idea, this is my 800th daily offering…

I have published 800 verses
Call the doctor and the nurses!
Call the men in their white coats
Call the men who stare at goats!
Every morning come rain or shine
I compete another rhyme!
What I’ll write I never know
Look for a picture and off we go!
Sometimes funny sometimes sad
Sometimes good mostly bad!
Some hardy folk ask for more
Today’s is covered in dust from the store!
So thank you for reading this silly rhyme
I hope I’ll see you another time!
Postscript: The last wheat went into the barn just after 2.01am followed by rain at 2.10am. That’s a close call in anyone’s language! So that’s all the wheat in the barn, just beans to go and they’re still green!

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E-mail: baldockbard@www.baldockbard.co.uk
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