Over the weekend I’ve played host to a guest from the West Country. Whereas our annual rainfall is measured in inches, down there they measure it in feet! I showed my ignorance of recent weather conditions by driving my guest across a rather damp field with unexpected but obvious consequences…

“Just here is something I want to show,
Oh dear, we seem to be going slow,
I fear the ground is rather wet,
and this 4×4 is about to get set!”

I put the gearstick into ‘low’
not an inch further did we go,
the wheels had dug themselves a slot,
any forward motion was soon forgot!

I rang John, “Could you possibly bring,
the JCB Loadall forklift thing!”
He arrived with a chain,
to pull us onto the dry again!

So if you make yourself look a fool,
Make sure you have a ‘John’ to call.
And if you’ve no John (or one that suits)
make sure you’re wearing Wellington boots!
With grateful thanks to John for saving the day and to my guest for covering my embarrassment! Next time I shall eschew laziness, put on wellies and walk!

© Baldock Bard 2015
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