The Evil ‘S’ Word! | Baldock Bard

The nose-in-the-air do-Gooders have moved on. The war against tobacco has been won and climate change protest is now part-time since governments discovered it’s magical revenue-raising powers. The new target, in a supermarket near you, is now (whisper it if you dare) sugar. Yesterday I came under scrutiny from one of the new ‘Sweetner Warriors’ and it wasn’t a pleasant experience…

Loading the checkout from my heavy trolley,
any comment would have been mere folly,
a bag of sugar – the devils thirst quencher,
was followed by chocolate milk – a sugary drencher!
Four bottles of green Coke came along next,
(the lady in front, now really quite vexed)!
Ten bottles of water ignoring ‘water-miles’
Sixteen cans of coke (all of them sugar phials!),
Three litres of Grouse on special offer,
Her face by now was ‘disgusted proper’!
She’d tutted so much her bottom lip quivered,
Her sweet-free shop she’d next have delivered!
But the funniest thing (I grinned all the way home),
She weighed rather more than my sugared twelve stone!

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